Ghost of Edward Little Appears in Cafeteria

On Thursday March 31, the ghost of Edward Little himself was spotted in the cafeteria during B lunch. The appearance of the school founder/mascot came as quite a shock to staff and students alike, as this was the first time anyone has seen the dead philanthropist in nearly one hundred and eighty years.
Witnesses say that at first, no one seemed to notice he was there, but after junior Bruce Gibbons attempted to shove past him, he couldn’t help but notice that he went straight through him. “I really needed to get my seventh slice of pizza and he was in the way so I tried to take him out, but it turns out he wasn’t even in the way at all,” says Gibbons.

Staff and students alike were thrilled to see that the man our school was named after had returned. He was immediately bombarded with questions. His thoughts of the school building currently, what he thought of  Zayne leaving One Direction, and if he liked Mass Customized Learning, were only a few of the questions people felt the need to ask. Unfortunately, the old ghost simply sighed and shook his head to every question asked. He reportedly stole roughly 25 packets of ranch dressing during his appearance.

“At first I didn’t even know it was him. I thought it was like, Thomas Jefferson or whatever,” said freshman Kelly Richardson. “It was really cool to see someone who was alive during World War II though! I asked him what color he thought the dress was but he just ignored me.”

It’s currently unknown what the ghost’s objective is and why he has reappeared, but he seems to harbor no ill will, only sadness. Mr. Little has made his way through most of the school now and seems to be quite saddened by what he sees (particularly with the math department). He does, however, continue to go down to the cafeteria every day to take more ranch dressing. It is unsure why he is stealing so many or what he intends to use them for.

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