Flappy, The Bird That Can’t Fly

Flappy Bird drivers user's mad

Flappy Bird drives user’s mad

If you claim to not know what Flappy Bird is, you’re lying. We all know about that stupid, frustrating yellow bird (that now changes colors each round) that you’re supposed to help fly between the pipes. Well, I have a few things to say to you Mr. Flappy Bird, but I have to censor it a tad because of the rules.

The idea of the game is to tap the screen to get Flappy to fly and you have to avoid hitting the pipes or the ground and for every set of pipes you make it through, you get a point. Keep in mind, Flappy seems to be one sensitive bird and is practically drawn to the pipes.

I’m sorry, Flappy, but I’m trying to help you fly and you’d think you would help me out a little. Seeing as you have like all this space in between the two pipes, I don’t see why you’re having such a hard time getting your tiny little birdy form through.

In case you didn’t notice, Flappy, you’re a bird. Birds are supposed to be able to fly and navigate around. Yet here you are, smashing into everything and dying. Half the time you don’t even touch anything. I guess I didn’t realize that you get heart attacks and die randomly. Oh, wait, that’s not part of the game? Come on, Flappy, get your act together.

I seem to just be waiting for Mario to pop up out of one of those pipes riding Yoshi to come and eat me or something. Can you imagine how much more frustrating that would make the game?

On a bit of side note before I jump into the game and kill Flappy, the creator of the app Dong Nguyen has deleted the app forever, saying that it is addictive and the success has ruined his simple life. Flappy, you’re off the hook for a moment, I’m jumping over to Nguyen for a moment. I have a few things for him. Yes, it’s addicting; I played for almost half an hour in study hall trying to get a medal (I got to 10 and won it in case you were wondering). Although now my high score is 14 (I know, pretty impressive). It just doesn’t make sense to me at all. The game was a hit and it seemed like a lot of people enjoyed it, there’s even a petition to bring it back, people are paying thousands of dollars buying products with the game already downloaded and others are making spin-off games.

Overall this game is fun, addictive, and agitating all in one. If you didn’t get the chance to download this game, be thankful. If you do have it, I wish you the best of luck in surviving.

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